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Post Your Photo: The Top Five Reasons

Kathryn B. Lord, L.C.S.W.

The most important part of your profile package by far is your picture. 

So why would a person NOT post a photo? 

The main reason I hear is “privacy” - people worry that others who know them will recognize the photo. 

Yes, that's a risk. But if that other person who knows you manages to stumble onto your profile, they are doing some deliberate searching around. 

Sites are making it more and more difficult all the time for the simply curious to get in and snoop. And if you've spent any time looking around yourself, you'll likely find yourself seriously bored pretty quickly, unless you are seriously looking. 

The boredom factor weeds out voyeurs pretty quickly. It's sort of like there being no point in being embarrassed about being at an AA meeting, because everyone is there for the same reason. Nobody goes for the fun of it. Or at least not for long. 

You can get around the *hometown* recognition problem. Match.com does searches geographically using your zip code. Simply put in another zip code, from the nearest large city. Now, that does mean that potential mates from your own area might miss you in a search, but you can find them (doing a search using your own zip code) and then refer them to your profile. 

Confidentiality is probably more about your own fears or embarrassment about going public with your interest in finding a mate. What's wrong with wanting to find a Sweetheart? 

Doesn't our culture give horribly conflicted messages when we all seem to be so obsessed with weddings and marriage, and yet somehow, we are not supposed to show interest in getting ourselves paired up? That's sick! 

Here are the top five reasons to post your picture: 

1. Both men and women want to see what you look like. According to Match.com, guys are 14 times more likely to look at women's profiles if there's a picture. And women are 8.5 times more likely to click through with a photo. 

2. No photo makes people wonder what you are hiding. A recent survey by JDate, the most popular Jewish dating site, found over 44% of respondents cited "No pictures" as the number one profile turnoff. 

3. Match.com allows searches of profiles with “Photos Only.” Likely a vast majority checks that box in the beginning and then never changes. 

4. "Quick Searches" on Match.com bring up pages with eight to ten short listings per page. All that comes up of the profile you worked so hard on is your photo, twenty-two characters of your headline, and the first few lines of your profile. That little bit of info has to be so good and compelling that the viewer will click on you to see more. And what really grabs the attention is that photo on the left hand side. 

5. You want to meet lots of prospective Sweethearts. Pictures get more clicks. Clicks mean more interest. Interest means contact, and then it's up to you! 

So if you want your profile to get any attention at all, you'd better bite the bullet and get your photo up there. Make it a good one!